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The beauty of life is, while we cannot undo what is done,
we can see it, understand it, learn from it and change.
So that every new moment is spent not in regret, guilt, fear or anger,
but in wisdom, understanding and love.
~ Jennifer Edwards
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Photo by Romany Soup on Flickr
You are the point.
I am the point.
Each and everyone of us is the point.
The point of existence.
The point of awareness.
The point of creating.
The point of receiving.
You are the point.
The point of presence.
The point of Light.
The point of attraction.
The point of Life.
You are the point.
The point of love.
The point of compassion.
The point of wisdom.
The point of connection.
You are the point.
It begins with you.
It ends with you.
The brilliantly, beautiful point.
Inspired by Adamus Saint-Germain and Shaumbra
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I Am Not Old
I am not old…she said
I am rare.
I am the standing ovation
At the end of the play.
I am the retrospective
Of my life as art
I am the hours
Connected like dots
Into good sense
I am the fullness
You think I am waiting to die…
But I am waiting to be found
I am a treasure.
I am a map.
And these wrinkles are
Imprints of my journey
Ask me anything.
~ Samantha Reynolds
Image and written word found on Facebook (Thanks Kay!)
Photo: Riitta Ikonen and Norwegian photographer Karoline Hjorth
What’s that saying? The only thing that is constant is change.
Change. We want it. We fear it. We bless it. We curse it.
It can be something that just happens, happens to us. It can be change for change’s sake. Or it can be meaningful, intentional…transformational. The kind you seek out. The kind that calls to you. A compelling. You know there’s more…more to you, more to life. So you commit to it. You begin a process, a journey. Not a journey to a place. The journey into you. Discovery of you. A discovery of who you are, who you are not, who you want to be.
Like all of life and especially in this process of self discovery, the thing you can expect for sure is change. But isn’t that what you’re calling for? If you’re like me, though, you’ll need to be reminded of that along the way!
Change happens at multiple levels, in layers, even if our perception is singular, seeing only one at a time. The ones we engage most directly include the mental, the physical and emotional layers. The more you can allow the structures and patterns of the old, that which no longer serves you, to topple and fall so that the real and true structure of you can stand, the easier it all will be. In these things, the heart is a better guide than the mind. The mind will follow the heart. Can you stop forcing answers in the mind and allow them to flow to and through the heart? Can you allow the simple answers to come to you? If you call for them, they must come. Can you allow them to come to you?
Attitude and Perspective
In all things along the way, it is simple, but not always easy. That’s where your perspective, choices, and attitudes make a difference. Do you believe it has to be hard? Do you think if it’s simple instead of complex, it is somehow less than? My experience is that the wisest teachers, the most profound insights are simple and profound. If it’s complex, it’s false. Often that means someone’s ego or confusion or agenda has been infused into it. Your intuition, your discernment, your gut will serve you well in getting at what’s best for you. Distill it down to its simplest form, it’s core or root. That’s where the wisdom lives.
As you peel back the layers and levels, can you imagine that you’re unwrapping gifts for yourself? Can you see, feel and experience the changes and be grateful? Some days this will not be easy. You may curse yourself (and maybe me ; ) ) for choosing to begin at all. But, remember, you called for it. It is happening as it should. Not because of fate or destiny or karma, but because you called for it. You, the creator of your life, said I know there is more! Bring it on!
It’s all just experience. Can you take the charge, the judgement of right and wrong off of it? Can you let go of the expectations you had of how it would go and instead trust yourself? Trust that it is sacred. It is happening appropriately. The less you resist, the less you worry, the easier and more gracefully the experience will be. I speak from experience. I speak as one who was the QUEEN of WORRY for most of my life. The worry colored every part of my experience, making it challenging and scary at every turn. But, the more I got into a place of deep trust of self, the smoother things went. It took practice. It took discipline. But I did it. It can be done. Deep, conscious breathing helps. Stepping into the role of observer helps.
If this sounds all too familiar, for now, take a deep breath and give yourself credit for taking some of the first and vital steps into awareness of the grander You. I predict that you will look back on this time you have chosen for awareness and transformation, you will look back on even the toughest of times and see them, feel them and know them as precious. Don’t be mistaken. I’m not promising all sunshine and rainbows. It can be disruptive, dramatic. Things can feel like they’re getting worse, before it feels like they’re improving. But even that depends on your perspective. If you see things as if nothing is wrong, that everything is happening for a reason, your experience will be smoother and easier. What I can promise, though, is that you’ll ultimately be freer and more authentically you than ever before. And isn’t that worth some discomfort? It was for me!
In the beginning it takes a while to see things differently. Even when you want to see, clarity may still elude you. These are layers upon layers you’re dealing with. It requires the greatest trust of all – the trust of self. That said, once you become aware of something, you can never become unaware. And 80% of personal growth is awareness, the process of becoming aware. The remaining 20% is applying the wisdom, putting it all into practice. But don’t discount the getting there! I think that’s the hardest part…the willingness to pay attention, to open your eyes, to see what you’re ready to see.
Processing, exploring, releasing and clearing, these are all ways to get started, but ultimately it will be about absolute trust, absolute acceptance of self, love of self, compassion for self and allowing you to be the true and authentic you. Period. A lack of trust in self results in isolation, restricted energy flow…life-giving energy flow. You pinch off the natural flow, allowing yourself only enough to get by. You give yourself just enough.
But what’s possible when you step into trust, when you begin to nurture and love you? What’s possible when you begin? It’s different for each of us, but common themes emerge. It’s possible that you’ll start putting yourself first. To notice and then stop the self sabotage and self betrayal (as I’ve said, the worst kind of betrayal). You’ll start speaking your truth more often. You’ll begin to feel more authentic, more like your true self. How you interact with the world will change. Your first relationship will be with yourself. Your expectations of self and others will begin to change. Your relationships will shift and change, becoming more based in trust and love. You’ll probably experience some peaking and plateauing. It’s normal! But, be certain, things will change. You will change.
It doesn’t matter how you begin, only that you begin.
~ Jessica Sackett
(I couldn’t find this quoted anywhere in this way, so you can quote me!)
Long ago someone told me that if I took one bold step, the Universe would take nine back toward me. I have found that to be true. There is magic in beginning. I send my blessings as you begin…or begin again, as I have done so many, many times on this journey.
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Header image via blog.freepeople.com
Happy Life via Furbish.com
As I mentioned in What to Expect, Part 1, while personal transformation, personal awakening is just that, personal, there are some common experiences. Emotional issues, which are often things from our past getting recreated as patterns, reveal themselves so we can break the patterns, clear them out of our way and allow our grander creations to come forth. It’s helpful to see them for their truth and not come to the wrong conclusion. See their gifts!
Emotional issues are linked to change in a couple of ways that I’m aware of. They can be the cause, the impetus behind a desire for change. They also come up in the wake of change as a response.
The latter, first…
When you take a step, when you make a change, doubt, fears, worries and questions can pop up in response to your action. It’s important to remember that this is normal. Everything that isn’t a match to your change, your new creation, your step, needs to come up to be released. They come up as emotional issues, patterns, beliefs. They can’t remain because they are no longer a match to who you are and where you’re going. You’ve changed. Our tendency is to feel all this “bad” stuff come up and then come to the conclusion that we did it wrong, we made a mistake, when in fact, the fact that it’s coming up is a validation, an affirmation that you’re moving forward. Be sure to look at it all through the correct lens.
Looking at your life, your reality…exploring your story…is for the purpose of gaining awareness. When we walk around in life, unconscious, life is just happening to us, buffeting us about. We are reacting, defending, responding. We’re back on our heals and in essence feeling a need to battle life. Choosing to become aware and conscious is part of seeing yourself as the creator of your life. Life not happening to you, but you actively engage it, create it. Asking the questions that get you to insight and wisdom. Using ALL the experiences, even the “bad” ones, as a way to know who you are and who you are not.
While, it’s important to see what the patterns, issues and beliefs are, it’s also important not to over process them. The more we engage them, instead of gleaning wisdom and the clearing and releasing them, the more entrenched they become, the more they dig in. You’ll have to feel into it for yourself, but in my experience, when I’m telling a particular story about my life over and over to everyone I meet, that story, that issue is still active. There is still something to be understood and then let go of…once and for all.
The former, second…
There are many things in life that can nudge (or shove) us into the first steps of our personal awakening — a health challenge, relationship trouble, career issues, just to name a few. Something happens in our life, forcing us to snap out of our regular patterns and life cycles or jolting us out of our stuckness or rut. It causes pain, frustration, anger, some intense feeling, so we’ll pay attention.
Something deep within us is calling for more, encouraging us to step more fully into our truth. The status quo is beginning to chafe. So as sucky as it can feel, all of this serves the purpose to compel us forward, as my mom says, out of our fur-lined rut. Your life is trying to talk to you. First it throws a pebble…then a stone…then a brick…and then things start to get really dicey. (I encourage you to listen well and respond early!)
That’s the good news and the bad news. It’s a pain in the neck until you see the pattern. But having it repeated helps you to see it, so you can finally dissolve and resolve the pattern!
Processing, exploring, releasing and clearing….these are all ways to get started, but ultimately it will be about absolute trust, absolute acceptance of self, love of self, compassion for self and allowing you to be the true and authentic you. Period.
See the steps, take the steps…
Become aware. Once you become aware it, you can never be unaware of it again. Until then, we recreate and repeat and play out our beliefs and issues over and over again.
See it in action. Watch for it. Notice when it plays out in your reality. It’s transferrable. What you see in one relationship, you often see in other relationships or situations, from the present or the past.
Work with it. Explore it. Ask leading questions. See it from new perspectives. Use the tools available to you to support yourself. Get at the root cause, which may surprise you. The skills you learn as you go are also transferrable.
Embody the wisdom. Don’t keep it alive. Glean the wisdom. Claim the gifts. And then let the issue go. The vicious cycle doesn’t need to continue.
Support as you go…
You may find you’d like support with this this deep work. There are some great tools to help you through, namely the cards that Carla Berg has on her website. They’re free! They are a wonderful way to gain new perspectives on things you’ve gotten so used to seeing in one way and get at the root. Too often we deal with symptoms of issues not the source or the root. Whether you’re faced with an issue or going through a transition, there are cards to help you discover what is there, within you, that is ready to be seen. If you’re looking for more personal insight, she also does one-on-one sessions.
And if you’re up to the challenge and looking for a partner in your exploration, this is also a great time to hire a coach…like me. I am passionate about this kind of self-discovery and insight work and I honor your choice to take grander steps into you. Learn more about my practice here.
Header Image: Eyes by Robyn Britz
Footer Image: Nina Warmerdam